Born on 3rd of July!

July 3 is the 184th day of the year (185th in leap years) in the Gregorian calendar.

324 BC - Battle of Adrianople Constantine I defeats Licinius, who flees to Byzantium.

987 BC – Hugh Capet is crowned King of France, the first of the Capetian dynasty which ruled France till the French Revolution in 1792.

1423 AD – Birth of King Louis XI of France.

1884 AD – Dow Jones published its first stock average.

1937 AD – Birth of Tom Stoppard, the British playwright.

1962 AD – The Algerian War of Independence against the French ends.

1962 AD – Birth of Tom Cruise.

1971 AD – Death of Jim Morrison.

1984 AD – Birth of Tito. In the State infirmary of Jhumri Telaiya, to a bourgeoisie couple was born a kid with an upper class lifestyle.

2009 AD – Twenty five years have gone by and he has led a common man’s life.

As the Irish saying goes, Here's to a long life and a merry one, A quick death and an easy one, A pretty girl and an honest one, A cold beer and another one.

Cheers!

Hai…. Fraands?

Friendship is a term used to denote co-operative and supportive behavior between two or more humans. It connotes a relationship which involves mutual knowledge, esteem, and affection along with a degree of rendering service to friends in times of need or crisis.

I remember when the first time the Internet was set up in my home. It was a ‘Sify’ prepaid twenty hour pack. I was in my eighth grade.

Before long, I discovered the pleasure of chatting online.

During those days, Yahoo! Messenger was the most popular platform and ‘Hi... asl?’ was the most common ice-breaker used to initiate conversation. I was entering my puberty and so my libido too, was at a very nascent stage. I remember trying to start chats with women, (I am saying women, because in those days users felt that the person behind a female ID would be a female only) by directly saying, “Hi, do you want to have sex?” instead of ‘Hi... asl’ or even a simple ‘Hello’.

And I used to get so stimulated if she replied to it… even a buzz or ‘NO’ from the other side would make me all charged up and I would quickly make few calls to my friends to discuss the incident.

I was fourteen at that time. A decade has passed.

Things have really changed now. Whether it’s my relationship with women or the ice-breakers.

The advent of Orkut revolutionized the entire platform for connecting, chatting and networking with new and different people. Also, with more information available about the user unlike Yahoo!, like tastes, preferences, hobbies, pictures, there was more infiltration of requests for generating conversation.

As the time-honored tradition suggests, the best method was to befriend with the woman and then have a chat. In the midst of all the frantic endeavors by the boys to woo away girls, the poor word “FRIENDSHIP” has undergone many modifications like fraiensip, frensaip, fensheip, fnehesip etc. etc.

Also, the guys’ desperation ruined the beautiful English language and seeing which, an Englishman would have certainly sued them for slaughtering his mother tongue.

Members of the opposite sex were also jaded by the guy’s despair. (I believe this would have been once in centuries that a woman is not happy to see men falling for her.)

Anyways, so here are some of the modified, self-made, and recently used approaches to have frainedsheip.

Enjoy reading.

Cheers!

P.S. Special thanks to my ex-roomie, friend, chicken-mate and fellow blogger Vineet a.k.a Bakri for his technical assitance in uploading the pics.

Confession of a Liar!

Lord I am confessing my sins and repenting in your name so that my sins may be forgiven.

Yes,

• I did hide my mother’s handbag and irritated her when she denied me an ice-cream.

• I did mix wheat flower in my Dad’s Talcum Powder, when he once shouted at me.

• I did steal fifty rupees from my sister’s wallet.

• I did sell a floppy disc to Rishabh for Rs. 300 and ate Chicken Chilly for one week.

• I did lie to my parents and took my Dad’s best friend to school, when I was suspended for throwing chalk at the teacher.

• I have been lying to my college authorities for the past four and a half years that my Grandmother died “last week”, whenever I needed an extension for depositing examination fees or submitting journals.

• I did lie to Gauri Chauhan that I am at my pal’s place, when he used to come in the afternoon.

• I did lie to my parents that I have cleared my previous semester.

• I have beleaguered Neelanjan with my gyaan everytime he entered my room.

• I have tortured HBK everytime we sat for drinks on his love for old Hindi Ghazals.

• I did play a prank on V2 to prove that he did not know who the Prime Minister of India is.

I did it all Lord, but please, don’t scourge me like this!!!

Do you have any clue how much weight I have put on?

My expenses are burgeoning and I am stripped. No money at all.

Lyka Labs is still at Rs. 39.80 and I am bleeding at a loss of ten rupees per share.

I am also suffocating in anxiety about my semester results.

I am so eager to go home and eat properly, but I have to stay in this city for my Visa processing.

Half of my pals are gone and the remaining would also leave in a fortnight.

So Lord Save Me. Shower me the Holy Spirit and wash my sins.
Amen…!

Best of 2007!

My first post for this year; paying tribute to the last year, its blessings and mis-happenings.

The Best Compliment:

You were so persistent that I had to take you.

My boss at Merc who offered me an internship after pursuing him for ten months. The stint was rather a honeymoon period, which turned out to be a wonderful exercise for exploring features and applications of various social networking websites.

The Best Feedback:

This is goldmine.

By my boss on my Art Funds research, during my stint at one of the law firms in Bombay. Though I did not work that great to secure an offer from them.

The Most Memorable Weekend:

Well, I should say the entire week I was at home. I saw my folks after a year and half. I had to go; else they would have disowned me from whatever small assets my father has bought in his lifetime.

The Most Blessed Time:

The job offers. The most sought after. The most awaited. And the most needed.

I AM blessed.

The Biggest Noticeable Change In Perception:

• Women can be wiser.
• Code of Civil Procedure is actually interesting.
• Aerated non-alcoholic beverages though seem to quench your thirst; however, it eventually de-hydrates your body.
• I would soon love Dilli for its finger-licking Chicken Tikka Masala.

The Best Movies:

• That Thing You Do
• Dr. Strangelove
• Bourne Ultimatum
• I Am Sam
• The Good Shepherd
• Twelve Angry Men
• Thank You For Smoking
• Blood Diamond

The Biggest Influence:

• Professionally: For all the previous years as well, my Boss at Coke.
• Personally : Myself. For the way I have been carrying myself since last couple of years.
• Economically : My friend Rahul Kochar. And to quote him, “Tito, when you can’t stop spending money, then start making money, earning money”.
• Emotionally : The person for whom I started blogging.

The Most Heard Songs:

• When She Is Gone (Spock’s Beard)
• A Day Without Rain (Enya)
• That Thing You Do (OST- That Thing You Do)
• Trouble, Warning Sing, Crest of Wave and Pour Me (Coldplay)
• Aeroplane (OST- American Pie- Band Camp)
• Breathe, Great Gig In The Sky and What Do You Want From Me (Pink Floyd)
• Pulling Teeth and Fade Into Black (Metallica)
• Wasting Love and Hallowed Be Thy Name (Iron Maiden)
• Way Back Into Love (OST- Music And Lyrics)
• First of May, How Deep Is Your Love and I Started A Joke (Bee Gees)
• You Know You Are Right (Nirvana)
• Piano Man (Billy Joel)
• Last Request (Paolo Nutini)
• Something and While My Guitar Gently Weeps (Sir George Harrison)
• Extreme Ways (OST- Bourne Ultimatum)
• Stay, Seek You Out and Carnival of Rust (Poets of Fall)
• Solitude (Ozzy Ozborne)

The Best Books:

• The Kite Runner- Khaled Hosseini
• Ninety Minutes On Entebbe- Dan Stevenson & Uri William
• Zen and The Art of Motorcycle Maintenance- Robert M. Pirsig
• Half A Life- V.S. Naipaul
  
• Interpreter of Maladies- Jhumpa Lahiri
• Notes To Myself- Hugh Prather
  

The Best Surprise Package:

• The Job offers.
• My father’s superannuation benefits.
• Religare’s listing at Rs. 601, against the issue price of Rs. 160.
• Realization of my Provident Fund money within two months.
• The winters in Poona. I had the opportunity to wear my best sweat shirts and pullovers.

The Biggest Investment:

• My New IBM.
• Jaiprakash Hydro BSE: 532627 | NSE: JPHYDRO | ISIN: INE351F01018

The Greatest Quotes’ Of The Year:

• “My work done my way. A private, personal, selfish, egotistical motivation. That's the only way I function. That's all I am.”

Fountain Head | Ayn Rand
Part 4, Chapter 8, pg. 580

• “To a woman in love, loving too much is not loving enough”- Oscar Wilde

• "There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy."

William Shakespeare | Hamlet
Act 1. Scene V abt. 1601

• “Success is like masturbation, only your own hand can let you achieve it.”- Anonymous

• “Silence doesn't mean your sexual performance left her speechless.” – Anonymous

And

• "It is not easy to live with things that do not fall in line with your ideologies, but at least one can choose to accept the differences. Maybe we can’t find solutions all the time and its best to part ways." ||SA||

The Most Precious SMS:

Even this year

“Take care of your self. You know something… I miss you.”

Date: 09-08-2006
Time: 11:30 PM

The Happy Discoveries:

• Hotel Radio- For its seekh kebabs
• www.piratebay.org- For the best torrent files
• Javascripts- For unlocking Orkut Albums and Scrapbooks.
• CIA- For offering internships to law students.
• Duty Free Shops- For cheap availability of Scotch Whiskey.
• The benefits of mustard oil massage during winters.
• The pleasure of making a fake profile on social networking websites.
• My willingness and actual act of attending my college’s batch get-together.

The Remarkable Differences and Their Figures:

• My music collection (including videos) has surpassed 100 GBs.
• My vice crimes are standing at a staggering 52 GBs.
• My debts have been substantially paid off and my current standing is only Rs. 37, 000.
• The number of women with whom I am talking through my fake profile has crossed 50.
• I have gained an obnoxious amount of weight and I am currently weighing 94 kgs.

• I would be earning 160 times more than my Father, 120 times more than my Mother and 7 times more than my Sister, when they had started earning for the first time. However, their love and affection, that would be for eternity and infinity. (Thanks to Vineet a.k.a Bakri for suggesting this particular contrast.)

• My appetite for alcohol has increased and I can stand straight even after four 60 ml pegs.
• Thankfully, quite recently my nicotine intake has diminished considerably and I am smoking less than 4 sticks a day.

• My work experience in my five years of law school stands at 27 months and which fetched me 3 job offers.
  
• My academics are still a disgrace. I was among the two guys who re-appeared for Code of Civil Procedure in the entire batch for the fourth time. My scores are still below 55%.
  

Hmm.. so far so good. Hope to have more experiences, more learnings and more growing-up in the coming years.

Cheers!

Things you always wanted to know about Bongs

1. We smoke a lot

2. We cannot go to the loo without the morning nicotine shot.

3. A square meal does not necessarily mean MACHER JHOL AAR BHAAT. Though we eat it on most occasions.

4. We are different from Bangladeshis!!! West Bengal is a big state in India.

5. We love DADA and MITHUN DA. They are IMMORTALS!!!

6. We do not believe in ARRANGED MARRIAGES! However, some of us fatally overwhelm to MA's pressure.

7. We have a thing for FOOTBALL. Does not matter if it's MOHAN BAGAN or MANCHESTER UNITED.

8. Not all the literary works are the gift of RABINDRANATH TAGORE. There are many other veterans as well, though he is the father of all!

9. We prefer saucering issues of national interest- locally jargoned as ADDA.

10. We DRINK heavily...often accompanied by BABA and JETHU.

11. We are also very HORNY and have an insatiable sexual appetite.

12. Last but not the least. We are intellectually stimulated, so BONGS ROCK!!!!!...

Every true Bong will agree with the statements made above. Any ideas or suggestions are welcome...they will be incorporated!!!

PINAKIN and the Doomsday!

This post was pending for a long time.

During the first year of law school, we have been taught the meaning of the word ‘LAW’ and also the various sources which induced its origin. Among the numerous origins, two most relevant points for this post are:

1. Precedents: In a layman’s language, it would mean any statement of law made by a judge in a case, can become binding on later judges and can become the law for everyone to follow. In common usage, it would be like an example set forth.

2. Traditions: They are basically, different local practices in a state, community or any geographical body, which existed since ‘time immemorial’ and which were practiced by the inhabitants there. They are established patterns of behavior that can be objectively verified within a particular social setting

So when in the summer of 2004, I entered PINAKIN, I was given a detectable indication of the prevailing customs, the precedents laid down and also the law which was in a nascent stage at that point of time.

To give a small overview of Pinakin, it is an accommodation for bachelor students, in one of the posh localities of a town situated 18° 34' North| 73° 58' East- Planet Earth. It has been an abode for existing and future entrepreneurs, business experts, HR savants, Marketing Gurus, Finance Pundits and surprisingly, Legal Heavyweights too!

The place is governed by a pain-in-the-ass (as remarked by Bakri) landlady, who loves to shout the name “Arindam” every now and then, and more often when the person is “basking” in his room. The maid servant i.e. bai or more precisely in terms of the residents- the SPY, acts as the law enforcement machinery, who supervises the implementation of all the rules and regulations laid down by the Lady and also monitors any suspicious moves of the residents which might anticipate rebel, disharmony or chaos.

Thus, the Lady is aware of all the happenings and also at times the “mis-happenings” going inside Pinakin. From shifting of chairs from one room to another to joining of two beds. From knowing the color of ones bedsheet to the usage of ones towel by another. From gathering of friends for dinner to chats between the lovers outside the house. And from the holy smoke of the burning tobacco to the pure aroma of the nectar.

Now talking about the precedents and customary rituals; it has been observed that whenever a resident enters this place for inhabiting and subsequently departs, when his objective is fulfilled, there is a remarkable difference on two spheres, his relationship status and physical attributes.

When the occupant commences his stay here, he is either single or courting somebody. If he is single, he gets involved into a relationship, weave dreams of a well settled life and as soon as he is about to leave, his story comes to an end. And on the other hand, if he is dating a damsel, the chemistry goes perfectly fine between them till his final months of stay and eventually he faces the same destiny.

The resident enters this new place with new set of clothes for going to the new college. However, what is surprising is the fresh set of outfit turns into stale in a very short span of time. It’s NOT because the cupboards are poorly maintained and dwelled by termites, but on account of an imbalance in the residents Body Mass Index, which is caused by a substantial increase in weight.

Now after residing here for almost four years and also being the senior most citizen of this place, I hereby take this privilege to promulgate and enact the following legal principle for ones stay at Pinakin:

Any person, who by virtue of his own will or under any compulsion resides in Pinakin,

a) shall lose his beloved, or if he is single, he would somehow get his darling and will eventually fail to pursue her; and

b) that he would also gain an obnoxious amount of weight which will lead to an increase in the size of his waist as well as the consequent expenses.

The above law is based on traditions which have been pre-dominating since last couple of years and also on many precedents and witnesses, who are none other that the ex and the existing residents.

2004: Marhu, Jumbo, Baba and DJ experienced their relationship issue. While leaving, their waistlines were increased by at least four inches taking the figures to 36”, 40”, 34” and 34” respectively.

2005: Naulakha, Niroj, and Mowgli were troubled in their love life. Some of the survivors had to succumb to the forces of their parents and settled for an arranged marriage. In one year, they were looking like Uncles from college going kids, due to the visible double chins and the belly.

2006: Bakri, Pinky a.k.a Nero and again Mowgli; all were once happy with their respective partners. Shit Happened! Today, all are enjoying their single status. They have also made some heavy shopping during the sale season for lose-fit trousers. Even Neelanjan realized his flab below the chin while shaving, sometime in January.

2007: ME. Devastated and broken! Infact, Rup Chand and I are on a spree to create an unsurpassed record for weight increase in the history of Pinakin. He is maintaining 110 kgs, I am only 20 kgs behind him. Papi says that he would try to cut down his beer intake to remove the adipose tissues.

Now there were also certain exceptions to the law who were not influenced by this jinx. And they are worth mentioning in this post.

2004: Gambler. The guy who taught me that “Tito, if it’s difficult for you to save money, try to earn money”. You rock, Dude.

2005: Surekha. He has become an entrepreneur with a flourishing business in South east Asia. Though his paunch was an issue at that time, but I think hard work and labor has melted it.

2006: Prem. To the best of my knowledge, the most highly “work-ex’ed” student in the Institute’s history. A fellow worshipper of beef-fest. After the placements we will have some great time.

2007: CEO saab and Papi. CEO has negated the effects of the jinx by staying as slimmer as possible, perhaps change in trends and we might see the future residents losing heavy pounds of weight rather than putting on. And, I hope Papi shaves before his marriage, and leads a great life ahead.

To conclude, I am delighted to take this aureate opportunity to wish success and growth, not mainly physical, to all the ex-, existing and future residents of this memorable place. It was wonderful meeting everybody and we had a great time here.

Keep Rocking

Cheers!

Point No. 9 and no. 40

Feeds in no. 9 and no. 40. reminds me of many things. It seems ages have passed, but it was only ten days back. The Singapore news actually made the difference, and today, the post. Flustered, though feeling good. Happy-Smiling- and-Happily Smiling....